


Come Back to Me

by godbless_shitposting



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, This starts out pretty angsty ngl, Trust me on this one, it all works out in the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-23
Updated: 2017-11-23
Packaged: 2019-02-05 21:40:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12802944
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godbless_shitposting/pseuds/godbless_shitposting
Summary: "Not wanting to wake his neighbors, he pleaded silently. He begged for Barry to come back to him. He wished to see Barry again, just for one minute. Then he wouldn’t have to ask of anything more. He just wanted one minute, was that too much to ask?"





	Come Back to Me

**Author's Note:**

> Julian never got the memo that the Flash was back. Three months after Barry's return, Julian decides to fly to Central City to at least try to get Barry off his mind. It proves to be very counter-productive when he sees Barry.

Julian groaned as his eyes snapped open. Nothing was going to help him sleep. He had tried a fan, but that was too loud. He had made himself a cup of tea, but that had made him more awake than anything. He had grabbed the most dull novel he owned from the shelf in the living room, but he had read half of it before realizing it was a lost cause. Now he was resorting to closing his eyes and lying still. And it wasn’t working.

Julian sighed and ran his hands over his eyes. He glanced over to the clock on his bedside table. 2:24 AM. Julian cursed in a muttered voice. He couldn’t pin his insomnia on jet lag anymore – it had been nine months since he’d returned to London. Nine months since Barry Allen had left his life. Julian felt his heart squeeze at the thought. Once he started thinking about Barry, he couldn’t stop. He thought about how they immediately hated each other when they started working together. How that had lasted for a year before there was a completely new Barry that was willing to trust and help him. How, even though Julian swore to himself that he wouldn’t, he fell for Barry. How he didn’t get the chance to tell Barry how he felt before he simply waltzed into the Speed Force.

It wasn’t fair.

Julian sighed as he pulled himself from his bed and crossed his room. He walked to the desk in there and took hold of his laptop. Not having the energy to actually sit straight at a chair, he sat back down on his bed and opened the lid. He was immediately confronted by a blinding light. He had to squint his eyes and blink for a minute or so before getting used to the brightness. He typed in the password to his account, the only one. His eyes followed the small dots as they chased each other in a circle. Soon enough, he was hearing the loud start-up noise of Skype. He cringed and lunged for the volume control. He always forgot to turn his volume down before shutting down the computer.

Skype opened and Julian felt his stomach sink as he saw yet another notification from Cisco Ramon. He clicked on the contact and noted the now 15 unanswered calls. Since he’d left Central City, he couldn’t bare being reminded of the entirety of the United States. It always led him to thinking of Barry, then of how he was gone and there was nothing he could do about it. Julian let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding when his phone vibrated. He picked it up and read the notification. It was some spam email. He opened his phone and immediately deleted it. He hated his inbox to be cluttered and usually deleted emails that didn’t matter or in which the conversation had ended.

Before the reasonable part of him caught up with his hands, he had opened the photo gallery. There were two photos that he hadn’t had the courage to look at in nine months. He had a thing about having a photo for everyone in his contacts. That way, if something ever happened to him, the forensic scientist looking at _him_ would know what the suspects looked like. The first photo he had of Barry was the first photo he used for a contact photo. It was one week after they had become coworkers, and they were already not happy with the arrangement. Barry had a neutral expression in the photo, but the discontent was very prevalent in his eyes. Julian braced himself before scrolling along. He felt his heart skip a beat when he came to the only other photo he had of Barry. In this one, it was a little over a year since their first meeting. It was after Barry had revealed himself as the Flash and helping make Julian’s nightmares a little more tolerable.

Barry’s smile was more blinding than any light from Julian’s devices. He had seen his original contact photo while looking over Julian’s shoulder. He spent ten minutes protesting before Julian caved and agreed to take a new one and use that. At the moment Julian had his phone raised, Cisco chimed in with a borderline terrible joke.

_“Hey, Barry?”_

_“Mate-”_

_“No, I swear to God this is important!”_

_“What is it, Cisco?”_

_“What does Captain Cold do when he laughs?”_

_“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”_

_“What?”_

_“Cisco, don’t do it.”_

_“He Leonard SNORTS!”_

Julian hadn’t been amused in the slightest. Barry, on the other hand, started laughing hard and loud. It was the only noise Julian could hear. Barry’s face was the only thing he could see. His full grin was exposed. His eyes were shut enough to let Barry’s eyes sparkle and to create creases on the edges. The sight was truly breathtaking. Julian barely hesitated before taking the most gorgeous photo of the most gorgeous man on Earth.

Then the photo became increasingly blurry as Julian struggled to see through the tears filling his eyes. He quickly wiped them away, as if that would change anything. Within seconds, he felt the tears rush back. This time he didn’t even bother. He sat as he felt the tears slide down his cheeks and saw them fall to his laptop with a soft _pat, pat_. He couldn’t help but choke out a cry. It was half involuntary, half him needing to get it out. He clutched his phone with a death grip. Not wanting to wake his neighbors, he pleaded silently. He begged for Barry to come back to him. He wished to see Barry again, just for one minute. Then he wouldn’t have to ask of anything more. He just wanted one minute, was that too much to ask?

As heart-wrenching as it was, he needed to think of Barry. Julian had spent nearly a year avoiding thoughts of him, but now it was time to confront it. He pulled up Google Chrome and took no time to make his decision. He clicked on the search bar. He didn’t bother turning off caps lock. All that mattered was that he wanted, _needed_ to be with Barry. Or at least what was left of him. He didn’t even need to type more than an _f_ to get what he wanted. What he hadn’t been able to go through with. A flight to Central City.

An airplane ticket and a hotel room later, he leapt out of his bed and pulled a suitcase from his closet and threw in a random assortment of clothes. He didn’t care.

The next week was going to be the longest week of his life.

~~~

Julian had fallen asleep on the plane, but was awakened by the landing. He had made it through the airport half-awake. Now he was sitting in Jitters, with a coffee in hand. A Flash. With each sip, he grew warmer, but never enough. He wanted the real Flash. He wanted Barry. But he was gone, and this was how Julian was going to learn to accept it.

Julian’s eyes flicked up as he heard the door chime. He saw a familiar face and grinned. He immediately stood.

“Detective!”

Joe gave a careful and inconspicuous glance around until his eyes met Julian’s. His face broke out into a wide smile as he walked out of the line and over to Julian’s table, which had consisted of nobody but himself.

“Julian!” Joe greeted. “It’s nice to see you, man. What brings you here?” Julian instantly looked down, trying not to go into total distress.

“You have to swear not to tell anyone, or I’ll never live it down,” Julian said. Joe leaned in. “Barry. I know it’s ridiculous; he’s been gone for almost a year now. But I felt drawn back here because of him.” Joe was simply nodding.

“I understand,” he responded. He shot a look to the door. “Hey, if you want to come back to the precinct with me, a lot has changed in that lab.” Julian nodded.

“I didn’t have much else in the way of plans, so that would be great.”

Julian was weirdly excited to see the lab again. It was perfect to keep himself occupied but to still keep thoughts of Barry. The ache in his heart was beginning to subside as he thought of Barry’s life before he left. It felt like only moments before he was outside of the doors to the lab.

“Go on in,” Joe began, “I’ve gotta go downstairs for a minute.” Julian gave a wave before turning back to the doors. He drew in breath and pushed them open.

He immediately saw a fluff of brunet hair poking out over a microscope that somebody was looking at. Upon registering the noise of the doors, he looked up. Julian’s vision was immediately locked with a pair of emerald green eyes. For a moment Julian forgot how to breathe. Both pairs of eyes grew wide, almost in a panic.

“Allen,” Julian breathed. Barry was still frozen. Julian took a step forward. “Barry!” Despite Barry rushing toward him at top speed, Julian saw it all in slow motion. The tears filling Barry’s eyes. The sparks forming as Barry got closer and closer. The papers flying off the desks. The hand coming forward to cup his jaw. It was finally happening.

Barry Allen was kissing him.

_Hard._

“Julian,” Barry whimpered between a very brief separation. Julian didn’t let him go for much longer after that. Neither of them felt the need to breathe. They only needed each other. The only breaks they took were to whisper each other’s names. Julian’s hands were threaded into Barry’s hair. Barry’s arms were wrapped around Julian’s waist as he pulled him closer, practically on top of him. Julian almost couldn’t control himself. He was ready to drag Barry to his hotel room for _hours._ But he found it within himself to separate from Barry. Barry’s lips were red and wet. Julian couldn’t help but bite his own lip at the sight.

“Where the hell have you been?”

“I’m sorry.”

“No, God, Barry, no, don’t say that. Just… where have you been?”

“Speed Force. But when I came back, Joe told me you went back to London.”

“Barry, I missed you so much. I hate myself for not telling you how much you mean to me. When did you come back?”

“Three months ago.”

“ _What?!_ ”

“Cisco tried to tell you, but-”

“But I ignored him because thinking about him made me think about you and it hurt so much.”

Julian made a point of kissing Barry before he could say anything or apologize or anything stupid like that because he needed to _stop talking and kiss me, Allen!_ Barry found himself backed up and pressed against a countertop. Julian was so preoccupied with mapping out Barry’s mouth and hearing the quiet moans from Barry’s throat that he didn’t notice Barry’s hands grasping the fabric of his shirt. The fact that it was wrinkling was the last thought on Julian’s mind. The first thought was the damn button of Barry’s shirt that _wouldn’t move_ as easily as the first two.

“Oh, God! Sorry! Didn’t realize I was interrupting something!”

Julian almost threw himself off of Barry. They were both blushing profusely while Joe had his head in his hands. Julian cleared his throat while Barry struggled to rebutton his shirt with shaking hands.

“Erm-”

“Nope, no, I should have seen that coming,” Joe groaned. Barry gave a sheepish smile.

“It’s probably a good thing you walked in when you did,” Barry confessed. Joe gave him a pained look and covered his ears.

“Don’t need to hear it!” With that, Joe walked out of the room, leaving Barry and Julian to… have their discussion.


End file.
